I firmly believe that you are still with us, that you accompany us, that your soul and your presence are by our side. I could list the ideas, the madness that make me think so; I would like to dream with you, although the signs seen by those who loved you and still love you are pure happiness for me.

A few days before installing the banner with the image of Oscar Ó7 on the Sant Just football pitch, Oscar’s friends, the parents of Oscar’s boys’ team and us asked to prune the tree that would practically cover his image with its canopy. They organised therefore to go to the pitch at the start of the new season. Oscar, at least, would be close to his friends, the children and his dragons, and he would be able to illuminate, encourage and accompany all those children. Well, a few days before the banner was to be installed, a much-needed storm in Barcelona completely knocked down the tree that would keep Oscar in the shade. Now, the image of Oscar Ó7 «sempre amb nosaltres» (always with us) has plenty of space on the assigned wall. You can still see the trunk at ground level.

Travelling through Portugal, your cousin, who carries you in her heart, thought about where to place your Ó7 logo like all those who have had the opportunity to travel to wonderful places and have dedicated a moment to leave your mark. She looked up and without realizing was leaning on a totem pole with a simile of a symbol that was already part of the landscape, with a different shape but somehow connected with the intention of leaving your stamp in Portugal. It was not any other number, it was yours, O7.

During Ana’s 1 hour journey travelling from home to work in Dublin, the train made 2 stops. In one of them she could see a building and in the highest window a name appeared… OSCAR – just like that! That fact filled her face with tears, not with sorrow but with a tearful smile and a pang in her heart, «you are with me, I know».

This year you didn’t miss the legendary Kart race in Sant Just. You couldn’t go in person to see your friends, but you pushed with them helping them to reach the podium. They remembered you again, with your t-shirt and logo. The assigned bib number, which I did not choose, was 107. Not only does it resemble your O7, but it is also the number of the tomb where your body rests in Sant Just cemetery. Tomb number 107 was the first one they showed us and we decided without a doubt that it would be yours, where you would rest forever. A beautiful place of peace, close to your school and your football field.

After almost giving up the idea of buying a house, and just when they had no more hope left of fulfilling that dream, your cousins and your auntie got an opportunity after you left our lives. In a matter of weeks, the desired dream house opportunity appeared and selling their flat was quick. They never imagined that the number of that street was simply yours, number 7. And now we have Villa Oscar.

We are still by your side, keeping that smile of yours present. We have not left you alone. I know that your dragons visit you, they tell you about their upcoming football matches and give us a lesson in naturalness and normality. They say that you bring them luck; they have annexed death in a natural way, as it should be. Some of the kids take advantage of the occasion to do a drawing for you. They do not forget you and most importantly you continue to be a reference in their lives. Children of 6-11 years old can give us lessons, at least to me, about moving forward by integrating your absence in our day-to-day life. We live in a world in which we do not understand or accept death, not like yours, something we have not learned since we were children. We have been so protected in this culture that we are not able to understand that misfortunes like yours, so devastating and incomprehensible, can be real. For these children life goes on, for some more than for others, and while they explain to you what the next match has in store for them, they will play accompanied and guided by a light, the most beautiful light that illuminates our path.

Meanwhile, I keep looking for my signs, the ones you show me. I look in the sky and in the smile of a child like yours. I have realised how my inner self has changed, the inner sadness, the one that nobody sees, has come to stay, the one that suddenly and unexpectedly hits you and brings you back to a reality that you didn’t choose. We are no longer the same. «One day at a time» I say to myself, because it is not possible to cover more. Plans? I don’t know what that is anymore. Sometimes you try to plan something, however small it may be, and you realise that you file it away from your mind and you think… tomorrow will be another day, one more day… or one day less.