I have such a turmoil of feelings inside me that I will have to write more often because experiences are accumulating and each and every one of them deserves to feel, breathe, close your eyes and feel…

Beautiful moments in which a hug, the kind that you squeeze tightly, that you feel and restarts you. And although these are hard and difficult moments because health is not accompanying us in our family, here we are, facing everything that comes to us thanks to the energy that we transmit to ourselves; when one is weak there is another to continue. I see with perseverance, affection and love that the motto that I manifested in the Church of Sant Just, just today 5 months ago when we said goodbye to my child, is still maintained ALL TO ONE. We have to keep fighting, «keep swimming and don’t stop», together we will achieve it.

I don’t feel like I’ve had conventional vacations, health doesn’t accompany me and that makes me continue to understand that health is the highlight of the day, that without it we are nothing and that because of it, taking care of ourselves and those who love us is worth continuing, struggling; Even so, we allowed ourselves a kind of «retirement» to a wonderful place where we were cared for and pampered, where feeling at home is a reality, as well as treasuring a moment with a family that loves you, feels your pain, makes it their own and welcomes us. It makes the pain become fainter, mitigating the constant regret that we carry every day. Look at the sky and talk to him – Oscar this is for you.

There have been and will be countless places that Oscar has visited and will visit with his family, friends and even just acquaintances, who by joining #Ó7TRAVEL have made us enjoy images dreamed of by Oscar, places to which we have been transported. I have imagined that moment felt by that person or families who have marked a before and after in that place with the Ó7 logo, I thank you for that moment of your trip in which you have made us participants and you have had a moment to think about it. Thanks from my heart. I hope it helps you to live in the moment, enjoy it and take from your life everything that is beautiful in it. I keep all those trips with love in a special section of my Instagram, which I review from time to time, from Panama to Indonesia, Iceland or Mexico, Thailand or Germany, Madrid, Galicia or el Roc, and even the Plaza de la Pau de Sant Just has his logo somewhere.

The soccer dads, Oscar’s friends, have not stopped proudly showing the shirt with the «Sempre amb nosaltres» and finally and forever the banner of tribute to Oscar remains fixed on his soccer field where he has lived so many good moments, close to where he trained his dragons, there it is. We want to think that this image will remember the legacy of knowing how to be, empathy, affection, sacrifice and dedication that Oscar showed; camaraderie and exemplary behavior on and off the field; that all the new children who come and ask who he is, someone who knew Oscar will say, an example to follow, someone who will be watching you and always giving you strength to continue; When you feel weak, look at him and think: -Come on, cheer up, I can do it and I’m going to prove it to myself.

Yesterday was my birthday, facing another day is always complicated, celebrating years in this life that has touched us even more. Even so, yesterday surrounded by family we simply celebrated being united, nothing more and nothing less.

I notice his absence, it is the worst feeling and most difficult to appease, -empty- how I miss him. At night I discovered a video on his phone in our kitchen, of how he made a fabulous sandwich, step by step, which ingredients,… without talking to the camera, listening to his great songs and dancing, such fun, priceless! The only spectator was Max, oh Max! How many things do you have to tell me about your moments? It’s hard to see him but at the same time he comforts me. Sometimes I’m afraid, afraid of not remembering his touch, his smell and that curly hair, not remembering his gestures, those mannerisms of his, but thanks to those videos and many others that I have of authentic moments, I feel relief because although I know that he is no longer here and will no longer say “hola munch” or “hola madre” to me again, he will always be with me in those memories.

Thank you my son for allowing me to enjoy you for 18 years, I was very happy with your sister and your father, but your arrival illuminated our life with your simplicity, your antics and your peace.

Tomorrow Papa and I celebrate another year together, and now more than ever and, although I say it very often, I want to share the love and deep affection that we have for each other and that this tragedy has united us more than ever. THANK YOU my love for allowing me to be who I am at all times, for respecting my pain, in my own way, my pain as a mother who carried in my womb this son who was full of life, enthusiasm and joy; I don’t know what a father’s pain is like and I respect it as if it were mine, that pain that tears you up inside, that rage that you contain to keep breathing, that lioness vein that every mother carries inside, that you would give your life for him, that you respect me, you make it yours and we mourn it together. THANK YOU for your understanding of my perfectionism and stubbornness, more than ever. Your strength and your character give me relief and serenity, crying at home is as allowed as laughing, in the street, in the car, it doesn’t matter, it is part of our being.

I continue to promise to be there and continue looking life in the face..